Thanks

On this day of my birth, I give thanks to the people who have made an impact in my life, be they positive or negative. I would say that I will not be the same without the different forces that pull and push me in various directions to shape me into who I am today.

This is a perfect age, perfect in the way the Greeks define that of numbers. The future is forever mutable and hopefully bright, and as I stand among the rubble that was last year, I see myself being a happier person in time to come. May this year be better than all the years I had.

As I near my third decade of existence, I cannot help but look back at the road that I had taken. I do not believe in destiny, thinking that perhaps in some small way I am always able to shape my future. This, I have believed for quite a while, but as one gets older, the confines of society start to demonstrate their power and cast doubts as to whether one could truly be as free as the wind and choose a life that they want.

No one lives forever, and I know I definitely won't. While young, I might have been destined for greatness or so they say, at this point in my life, I am seeing that greatness is no longer within grasp, for I have long since strayed from the so-called optimal path towards such an achievement. I wonder how people remain functional amidst such woeful realisations, and then discovered that their functionality comes from a self-imposed resignation that they are but a cog in the machinery that is humanity. And soon, I will be just another part of the Machine itself.

Maybe in the upcoming years I will lose much of my cynicism and return to a much happier state, but these are things that I do not know fully, since time is long and the fog of the future is still there. One does not make a decision that one does not understand---that is the order of things.

Perhaps I will write less cryptically when this day has passed on the things that I had done, as opposed to the aspirations that I have mumbled about here. Till the next update then.