I'm getting some 'nam style flashbacks, all because someone I have not met before decided to add my personal cellphone number (how this person obtained it, I know not, since I did not go round telling people to call me/use my cellphone number to contact me) to one of the infamous ``Whatsapp groups for work-related collaborations'' despite us having at least four different communication channels already (not counting the two email addresses). Oh, and this is all before I even have a chance to know the full terms of the arrangement, having only been told vaguely about it near the end of the day.
I foresee message pings at all hours on everything that is ``urgent'' with no proper triage, confuddled requests for changes that come in ad hoc ways, no over-arching understanding of what it is that is needed, with everything piecewise hacked together without any form of documentation of the underlying process as well as the overall managing process. Everything is a favour, everything is needed yesterday, everything is urgent, and whatever I say eventually becomes irrelevant.
I accidentally drank too much coffee (in a relative to baseline sense) to the extent that I find my hunger suppressed, my ability to sleep at night impinged as I wrestled the bugs and enhancements on a code base that I barely knew/understood. Lunch break hour today was essentially gone, and I had just clocked ten hours like that.
Already I had skipped out on a meeting for ``brainstorming'' because of this ``urgent'' issue, a meeting that I need to make it back up in the morning and beyond. The head honcho had laid his expectations quite clear about that item.
I drew the line for the Whatsapp group add; I've marked the hill I am willing to die on. It looks like I'm going to be another three hundred dollars poorer as I survive another day to finally get a replacement phone to run that second line once more--that delay of a day is because the shop is only open at a time that I can only reach after work. Not that it will completely remove the anxiety, but at least I can safely shove it in the box at the end of the day and not develop unnecessary anxiety. Maybe.
Somehow I feel that quitting within the first week from anxiety isn't exactly a good thing, no matter how one looks at it.
Oh, and I still have a nice pile of orientation to do too. And still, I feel wakeful, possibly due to a combination of that anxiety and caffeine.
God help me.
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