It's almost time to bid adieu to this place once again, and to embark on yet another leg through my undergraduate years. In the short months of summer, I've again experienced much more things as a human than before. So many things have happened, and so many things to happen soon, and all these sometimes weigh in on my mind even under the most unconscious circumstances.
Remember the nightmare I had the last time? Even more recently, I had a nightmare where I was being targetted by everyone as being the one who tries to one-up all the other folks, resulting in me being beaten up all over the place. Folks in that nightmare were folks that I knew before (thankfully), but it was really weird and unsettling at the same time. Shadow-side notwithstanding, I think that maybe it is a sign that I am still a little uncertain in some things that I need to do. So many things that can go wrong are just around the corner, and often it doesn't take much to be able to fall into that death-trap.
I guess that as time goes by, I become ever more resilient to whatever comes my way, perhaps through the easy learnedness that comes with the wisdom of age. I know that ahead of me lies many challenges, and slowly, I am warming up to them in a way that is more sustainable than the multitude of energy bursts that I used to have a long time ago. The energy needed to move on into my chosen field is one that must be released in gradual amounts, and not through that huge burst which, in the long term, will cause an early burn-out, which we all know to be the most suicidal of all techniques that we can use.
In other news, it seems that summer is the season where many folks break-up with their other folks. I have no idea why there is this the case, but it could all be due to coincidence, I guess. Something that I sort of realised about maintaining a good relationship is the need to have spontaneity from both parties. The whole idea of a relationship is not one that doesn't need effort to maintain once a certain level is achieved. A relationship between two people is not the status quo—there has to be some interest that is always being regenerated between the two. I make this comment not from my own perspective (too limited in scope, mon) but through the observation of couples who have been married for a long time. I observed them and tried to understand what made their relationship tick, and I finally dawned on this idea. It makes logical sense too; people get easily bored over things that are unchanging, and thus to maintain their interests, changes need to be introduced into the system. But of course, the said changes that we want to include into the system cannot be detrimental to the overall health of the system (in this case, the relationship), so some care needs to be exercised. This is akin to the Computer Science concept of the Edge of Chaos, where a healthy mix of static and dynamic elements can produce a new system that is dynamic enough to be powerful, yet static enough to not descend into oblivion.
Okay, I think that should do for now. Until next time.
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